All Hearts Break
by Lizzie Pond
Summary: After the Ponds' deaths the Doctor changes, for the worst. He takes it on the one person he loves, River Song. T for safety. Beware Domestic Abuse fic. Please read and review.
1. The Begining

**I wanted to test myself, so I've decided to write an abuse fic, beware it will get pretty dark and scary. There will be bad language and violence. **

_The Doctor_

There she was my wife, pinned against the wall by another man. Anger boiled inside me, I was sick of her flirting. She had finally pushed me over the edge. I went back to the TARDIS not wanting to witness River's adultery any more.

_River_

I finally escaped that drunk man, he had pinned me against the wall but I got away. I went back to the TARDIS. The Doctor was waiting for me, something was wrong "You just couldn't help yourself could you, River" he spat.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I saw you, River, against the wall" the Doctor snarled.

"Oh no my love. He was just a drunk, I saw him off" I assured him.

"Don't lie to me!" the Doctor screamed at me.

"I'm not!" I insisted "I'm going" I turned around and started to walk away. He caught me by the wrist and pulled me to face him "You're a slut, River" he growled. Tears prickled behind my eyes, my own husband just called me a slut. Before I knew what I was doing, I had slapped him across the face "You're gonna regret that" the Doctor promised. Oh I didn't doubt that. He slapped me hard across the face. The force sent me to the floor. The Doctor stood over me.

_The Doctor_

I looked at her, she was staring at me. Blood was dripping from her lip onto her blouse. Her eyes were full of fear, fear directed at me. I can't stand to look at her any more I run away, I run away from my wife. I leave her bleeding on the floor. I hide in an empty room, I've never seen before, I close the door and hid myself, the monster I've become. Why did I hit her? I hit her because she hit me. But she didn't mean to, she was upset. I wrestle with myself.

_River Song_

I sit on the floor focusing on breathing. In and then out. There's blood all over my white blouse. The Doctor ran away, he didn't even say anything. Tears are prickling behind my eyes, I let them fall. I pick myself up and walk. I keep walking but where can I go, an infinite machine but nowhere is safe. He can find me everywhere, he can always find me. I keep walking till I find a bathroom, I wash away the blood but I need to go to my room to change my clothes. But the problem is it's not my room, it's our room. I take a deep breath and go to our room, he's not there. I change into my pyjamas and lie on our bed. My eyes want me to sleep, but if he comes back. I don't know what will happen.

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	2. The Need to Breath

_The Doctor_

I spend the night alone, wrestling with the monster inside of me. In the morning I go to find, River. I find her asleep in our bed. Her arm over her eyes. I shake her shoulder "River, wake up" when she wakes up, she sits up and looks at me. Her lip's swollen, her cheek bone's bruised and her eyes are wild. "I'm so sorry" I say my voice shaking.

"So you should be" she says quietly. For some reason she makes me so angry. I nod and walk out.

_River Song_

There he goes again running away from his actions. I get up, get dress and go to the library. He's there. "I am sorry" he says again. I nod. "I really do love you, River" he tells me.

"You have a funny way of showing it" I spit. At that he grabs me by the throat and shoves me against the book case behind me. His grip isn't tight. Yet. "Does this make you feel good chocking your wife" I gasp.

"Don't make me" the Doctor threatens.

"Like you could" I growl. He tightens his grip, my lungs struggle of breath. I can't breathe "I can watch you choke, I can watch the light leave your eyes" he tells me. He starts to push me onto the floor, I lie against the bookcase. He takes his hand away; I put my hands around my throat. He kicks me and kicks me. I feel my ribs break, as well as my heart. "For your sake River, don't make me angry" he told me then he turned his back on me and walked away. I cried, like I've never cried before.

My husband had hurt me. But there is no where I can go, nothing I can do. He's bigger and stronger than me. I could fight him off for a while but in the end he'd get me or kill me. I am so scared he'll kill me; I'm not scared of dying. I'm scared of him hurting me for so long, scared of being in pain every second, every day, forever. When Amy and Rory died he changed, for the worse. If it gets worse I'll have to leave, I'll have to run and hide. Maybe when and if I come back, he'll have changed.


	3. Defiled

_River_

He apologised to me the next day and I think he meant it. I wish I could believe it. I feel like I'm walking on egg shells, I don't want to break them. He's acting like none of it ever happened, but I can't. I have the bruises. I haven't let him touch me, I haven't let him kiss and I haven't let him sleep in the same room with me. I can see it's breaking him, but I don't want him anywhere near me. I knew he'd try but I didn't he'd be so violent.

He pushes me against the wall of the TARDIS corridor; he forces me into a bruising kiss. As he kisses me, he starts to unbutton my blouse. "No" I shouted into his mouth. He carries on; I push him off and start to run. He catches my arm and drags me into a room I've never seen "No, get off" I scream at him. But he just pushes me onto the bed. I try to get away but he pins me down. I start to cry, still screaming but nothing stops him. I try to think of something, anything, to distract myself from what's happening. I want to black out; I so desperately want to black out. I close my eyes, blocking him out. I cry, tears slip out from my closed eyes. I'm still screaming, but my throat is sore and the scream runs out.

I don't move, I can't. I hear his breaths but I can hardly hear my own. I think of stars, I think of all the digs I've been on. I imagined the digs, I wish myself to be there. Imagining the dirt under my fingernails, the sun on my back, and the chatter of my students. I so want to be there.

_The Doctor_

I sit on the edge of the bed, after I've got dressed. She hasn't moved the entire time, she's lying there in the position I left her in. I her breaths are sharp and short. She's still crying, of course she's crying. She did this to herself, she drove me to this. "You bastard" she whispers, she's starring at the wall, not looking at me. I look her and slap her, opening a cut again, making her lip bleed. She looks at me, pure unaltered hate. I stand up and leave.

_River Song_

When he leaves I can breathe again. I don't move, I'm still coming to turns with the fact I have just been raped by my own husband. I lie still; I close my eyes, willing myself to get up. When I open my own eyes and stand up. I am half-dressed and bruises are blossoming all over my body. I leave my ripped off clothes on the floor. There's no en-suite in the room, so I left. Hoping never to see the room again. I open another door to reveal a bathroom, the TARDIS is being kind. I go and turn the shower on. I peel the remnants of my clothes of and step into the shower. The water in scolding hot, I don't change it. I feel like the heat is cleansing my body. The water hurt me when it makes contact with my numerous bruises. I can see blood being washed down the drain; I try not to think about it. When I step out I find a soft white towel, left by the TARDIS no doubt. I wrap myself in it. I leave the bathroom and find a bedroom. A set of pyjamas are set on the bed as well as a set of clothes for tomorrow. The TARDIS is caring for me; even my diary is on the bedside table. I put on the pyjamas, they're a light material so they weight doesn't hurt me. I climb in the bed, my sore joints making me awkward to move. I pull the cover up, my whole body aches. My hair fans out on the pillow, tears still trickling down my cheeks. I close my eyes; hoping sleep will erase the horrible memory. I know it won't.


	4. Escape

**Ok sorry I went back to school and have been inundated with homework.**

_River Song _

I have to get out, I have to get out. That's the thought I have every second of every day. He hasn't raped since the first time but it's only been 3 days. 3 days of hell. I had to come out of my adopted bedroom eventually. Once I did he watched me like a hawk, he didn't apologise this time. So I confronted him "Why did you rape me" I ask him.

"I didn't rape you" he denies it.

"Yes you did, I didn't want to do it" I protest.

"You're my wife, so it's not rape" he tries to defend himself.

"You have no idea" I almost scream at him.

"It's your fault, you didn't let me take what's mine" the Doctor shouts at me, his face close to mine. I'm so disgusted I can't even look at him. I run back to my room, I grab a bag and start throwing my clothes in it and then finally my diary. I have to go. Now. I put on my vortex manipulator but I'm stuck. Where can I go? I can't go to my parents, with timeline and everything. I can't go to prison, I'm pardoned. There's only one place I can think off, Jack. I tap in coordinates, grab my bag and go.

I arrive on Jack's doorstep; I ring the doorbell trying to fight off tears. Jack opens the door and the tears cascade down my face. "River!" he's so surprised "Come in" he guides me into the living room and sits me down on the sofa and sits next to me "What happened River?" he asks kindly.

"H-he raped me" I managed to get out.

"Who? Does the Doctor know? When?" the torrents of questions tumble out of his mouth.

"The Doctor raped me" I tell Jack. He looks at me stunned and puts his arm round me. "That's terrible River" he says.

"He's supposed to love me Jack. He's supposed to respect me. If he thinks he can rape me what to other men think?" I ask. Jack doesn't say anything "When?" he finally asked.

"A few days ago" I tell him "I had to get out"

"Of course you did" he agreed.

"I'm sorry to bother you" I say "Is there a hotel I can stay at?"

"You're staying here I will sleep on the sofa and you can have my bed" Jack enthused.

"Oh no I can't" I insisted.

"No you will" Jack says sternly.

"Ok" I conceit, deep down I know that if the Doctor ever finds me in someone else's bed he will kill me or do something worse.

Jack beds down on the sofa and I climb into his bed, it's big and has crisp black and white sheets. He put fresh ones on especially for me. For the first time in a long time I feel safe.

I wake up to someone shouting "Where is she!?" I know who it is. Footsteps come up the stars heavily and quickly. "You can't go up there she's sleeping!" Jack insists, he can't know it but he just made it worse.

"I bet she is!" the Doctor roars bursting into the room. I'm still lying in the bed frozen with fear "Get up River" the Doctor growls. I can't move, Jack is standing in the doorway still in his pyjamas "Doctor leave her"

"She's coming back with me!" the Doctor insists "Get up!" he comes over to the bed and grabs my arm. He drags me out of the bed, I scream and cry "No, no. Let me go!" he drags me across the floor while Jack tries to stop him. I try to scramble to my feet but the Doctor's too strong. He pulls me to the top of the stairs, I'm scared he's going to push me down them. Jack pulls him off me and I run down the stairs but the Doctor breaks free of Jack's hold and grabs me again this time by my hair and arm. I whimper but he doesn't relent. He sees my diary on the table by the front door, I can't even remember putting it there, but it's there. The Doctor let's go off my hair and picks up my diary, he opens the door and pulls me onto the street where the TARDIS is parked. Jacks yells "Doctor for god's sake let her go!" That's the last thing I hear before I pushed into the TARDIS and dragged to the console. He pushes me against the railing "Stay there" he hisses. I sit slumped on the floor as he takes us to deep space. He turns round and kicks me, hard, in the stomach. "He's my friend, River!" he yells at me "Do you shag my friends now?" I shake my head struck dumb. "Tell me the truth, you slut!" he leans down and slaps me.

"I am telling you the truth!" I half shout back.

"I found you in his bed, River! How stupid do you think I am?!" he asks. I can't anything I just cry and cry. "You will never leave the TARDIS again without me" I look at him. I'm a prisoner in my own home. He carries on "You _will _sleep in our bed with me. You _will _sleep with me. And you _will_ subservient" I can't do anything I'm trapped.

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